Friday, February 03, 2006
8:59 AM
ToreteNo, I don't mean the song, just the word itself. It's supposed to mean something similar to the word "giddy", dizzy with thought...something like that. It's pinoy slang or something, in
Pinoy Slang - brown language revolution it's defined as "nawala sa tamang pag-iisip" or in English to stray from a right frame of mind. I'm not sure if the word originally connotates romantic interest, all I know is that's how it was used in the song I posted before.
This piece of slang sums me up in 6 letters, 3 consonants and 3 vowels. I think excessively, so much so that I make myself dizzy with thought. I stress myself. In the last few years this problem has peaked and now plateaued but by His grace I am able to deal with it by praying and submitting all my 21 million worries to Him. My friends always tell me "You've thought bout it, you've concluded, you don't have to start at the beginning again", something to that effect.
I think (allow me to, just for this, hehe)it has to do with past hurts and the lie that if at least I think about the worst coming each time there's something I can't quite figure out...it may curb some of the pain, which I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW is wrong. It's a defense mechanism of the heart that just goes on and off, but Jesus wants our hearts open ready to love anyone and everyone, no matter what. He wants our hearts vulnerable for Him. He asks us to guard our hearts, but we are asked to love. How unique He is...what could He possibly mean in asking us to do both? I think it means we guard it from sin and everything unrighteous so that the love we are commanded to show others comes from a pure source. Hehe, I'm excited to learn more bout what He can do with this heart of mine...I feel it stretching, it aches, but that ache inside makes me want to run to Him, and I think that's a very good thing.
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